4S RANCH — Last week a flurry of gang-related activity sprung up in San Diego’s once-peaceful 4S Ranch community, leaving residents terrified and perplexed at the recent crime wave.
Jane Chatsworth, a stay-at-home mother of one explained, “4S Ranch has always been a sterile community. Up until this point we’ve always been able to drive away elements that threaten us…such as young single people, art, culture, and diversity.”
Chatsworth lives on Utopia Lane inside 4S Ranch’s exclusive Cookie Cutter gated community, where in one week, her house has dropped in value by $300,000.
4S Ranch has a long history of being one of the safest communities in San Diego. The area has been a sought-after place to raise a family and shelter kids from reality ever since the community was assembled in 2002, from a ‘build your own faux town kit’ ordered on Ebay. Because of the influx of gang related activity, 4S Ranch is now ranked 43rd in safety, just behind National City.
A playground once reserved for community children is now a gathering point for gang members
Mayor of 4S Ranch Joeseph Snook said, “Speaking as someone that’s been here in 4S Ranch from the beginning, rolling the synthetic grass on lawns, helping paint the stone patterns on the styrofoam walls, and plugging in the hologram fountains…I must say that I’m really concerned by the uprising of street gangs.”
Residents are advised to steer clear of anyone flashing the 4S gang sign.
The 4S Commons Town Center used to be the kind of place where families came together, lingered over breakfast, or gathered for a team lunch after the game. The area is now a cesspool of iniquity, and a breeding ground for gang members. That’s right, they are literally breeding behind the Pei Wei Restaurant…it’s quite disturbing.
How the gangs were able infiltrate 4S Ranch remains uncertain, though one 4S Ranch real estate broker has a theory.
“I noticed many 4S Ranch residents avoided paying their Mello-Roos tax in December. Most people are unaware that Mello-Roos keep gangs out of new communities,” said Carl Johnson, a chief broker at 4S Ranch’s Homes For Suckers Real Estate office.
. I don’t know who the blondie is.
{ 18 comments… read them below or add one }
That’s hard core. This whole city is turning into a slum.
As a resident of Foreclosure Ranch I find this article offensive and distasteful. By the way, we got our house from the “build your own overpriced-crammed-in-next-to-your-neighbor-fake-house-that-is-really-a-condo” kit on Overstock.com, not eBay.
WE TAKIN OVER DA JOINT! We gonna sit outside of coffee bean and drink yo’ lattes and steal your doggie carriers!
Break dance contest by the slides dawg!
4closure was doomed once they decided to put in the Wendy’s and the massive apartment complex on the side of the commons. Oh and the ghetto low income housing complex next to the police sub station.
4S fo life my peeps…. we takin’ over!
i voted for obama, where my money at
you’ll take over the graveyard once you are gunned down like the roaches you all are
roaches don’t get gunned down……stupid. read a book and eat some cheese
When does hunting season start on gangsters?
Yo, we bustin’ caps on all soccer moms driving SUV’s who got botox injections in their mouth, neck, eyes & ears. Quit trying to like like Howard The Duck, you uppity, educated, 4 year university attending skanks! 4 S Ranch Locos for LIFE or until we move into La Jolla shores!!
Bullshit, photoshop moar wannabe news fags.
wow. Grow some balls people. its 4s ranch. instead of working 80+ hours a week to stay in your overpriced home that is worth less then my house in mira mesa, spend some time with your kids. it all starts with the parents. In fact I am going to go hang out there this weekend and see what this is all about. for some reason “gangbangers” in 4s ranch just makes me laugh. really.
you are all dumb there is no 4s gang there will never be a 4s gang and if you see someone flashing the “4s” gang sign you should punch there teeth out cause there poser 14 yearolds
dude this is such bull. I live in 4s and the reporter here obviously does’nt know a thing. All he got as a quote was some “stay-at-home mom”. There will never be a gang in 4S. this kind of stuff happens when you have a neighberhood full of stuck-up teens who have the good life. shit happens. they’ll grow out of it.
Haha. Wow, I love the people who can’t recognize an article from the “official FAKE newspaper of San Diego”. Great story, can’t wait to hear about the results of the all-gang softball playoffs!
Steveo, I work 40 hours a week to live in my overpriced 4S home thank you very much.
Wow, Steveo is a loser. This article is fake, idiot! Thanks for taking time out of your weekend to do a sociological study on gangs in 4s ranch.
4s gangs genius! Can I join? Oh I mean jumped in..kind of a bigger guy how many of these gangsters are there? Also I’m not a huge fan of yellow..what are the gang colors? That may be a deal breaker..